Easter Sunday
“I’m not asking you to try harder, I’m asking you to try different”
…said my 16 year old son to an extremely frustrated mother, fraught with confusion about parenting. Throwing up my hands, I had just shouted, “ give me a break! I’m trying my hardest to get this right!”
And there you have it, out of the mouth’s of babes.
I’m not certain he was aware of just how prophetic that was, because, that is the way of the mystery of G-D’s gift giving.
Regardless, it pierced me deeply, like an arrow forcing me back to square one.
I share this with you, here on Easter Sunday, as G-D, once again allowed a small incident to happen to remind me of that very lesson as and in doing so reminded and affirmed His promises are always kept.
This son of mine, has become estranged. Naturally, I miss him. He is now quite the grown man, as I am quite an old lady. There is no doubt of our love for one another, only an absence of understanding.
I was sharing my deep and present sorrow with a friend, who reminded me of the parable of the Lost Sheep. God will forever collect his lost sheep, and she went on to remind me that even though we are unable to see the miracles in action at times, He is, never the less creating them, working wonders through each of us.
With that, we hung up the phone, and I went about my business, which for the day, was to unclog what appeared like a serious blockage. I do have a wonderful plumber, but I really didn’t want to bother him on the day before Easter. Anyway, I also have successfully declogged my share of drains. The three or four inches of water, was refusing to go do down. Rolling my shirt sleeves up, so to speak, I took in a deep breath, said a prayer, (here’s where I need to say, I forgot to zoom out and listen for the answer, but the answer always comes, it is wise to have a very good sense of humor). Then I proceeded to collect my tools, two different plungers, two different drain snakes, paper towels, buckets. bowls, and soft mat for my knees. Step one, says Google, remove all the standing water you can, using a bowl, transferring it to sink. Though extremely tedious, it was rather straightforward and easy. All the while I was doing this, I felt mighty proud, that even though I might have to, in the end, call my plumber, I was at the very least, saving him some time. Water out! check! Now standing in tub I proceeded to plunge, first within the little one and then the super deluxe. I might add, that I am no wimp and rather muscular. Just to say, that I gave it a good and hearty go. But nothing budged!Time for the snakes. Again, I tried both of mine, and was quite discouraged when they went down, returning with nothing at their end. Now here is where one might think I would have reassessed the situation. But no! You see, there were extenuating circumstances. I had, the night before, placed a synthetic furry cat pillow in the tub, which had caught fire. Solved that problem and walked away. So there was reason to believe the furry fibers had gone down the drain. At any rate, I was convinced, after all my efforts, that the clog site was well below, and that is when I called my plumber. After all, my mind was made up, no need to look for other facts! Ha!
I explained how much I had accomplished, and that I was deeply sorry to call the day before Easter, but there was nothing, I said, nothing further I could think of! I do have an exceptional plumber, because he is an exceptional human being, kind, generous, witty and most patient.
Are you all sitting at the edge of your seat?? Hope so.
He came! He saw! He conquered! He entered the room, assessed the array of tools, sat down at the edge of the tub. I barely had left the room, when he announced, gently, “you don’t have a clog”. Now looking in at him, still sitting on the edge of the tub, he slowly reached forward to the drain lever, and flipped it up.. Yep! That was it! I had done everything but the first and simplest thing. Oh, maybe there was a minor clog but in all the plunging I had done, I flipped the lever shut. Who knows? The point is that not ten minutes later, I could see my son’s face in my mind…”don’t try harder, try different” Yes, I took that as a gift the G-D had my son , and was caring for him in His perfect time.
Now if there are any of you wondering why this story is so significant, I ask you to try to recall a situation, where you were certain it would unfold in one way, only to be surprised. now, mind you, it takes humility and the willingness to be exposed as a fool. But, I assure you, this is where G-D does His best work. Was it a frustrating day? Sure. Was it embarrassing? Sure. Was it funny? You betcha. But most of all it was an exceptional Easter gift.
Signing off with “don’t try harder, try different” You might want to know where I got this try harder ethic. One image that comes to mind, is my dear Nana, who would get down on her hands and knees to wash the floor, believe me, there was nothing gentle about it. It was if with every heavy stroke, she was earning a step up on the virtuous ladder to heaven. Oh, I’m sure she got there, but, me? I’m using the Swiffer!. One more thing. Many traits skip a generation or two. My younger son washes his floor on hands and knees. .
Lesson??? The Flow, flows, it does not require pushing.
Best keep a good sense of humor and humility, then bow and say thank you.
Omygoodness...
I am a maintenance man. I've spent a good amount of the past two days trying to solve a clog... and used... public toilet. Two, actually. Back to back on opposite sides of the wall. I tried plunging. It did not work. I tried snakes. It did not work. I then discovered that when I flushed one, the (ahem) water went from one toilet and into the toilet on the other side of the wall. Fortunately, I discovered this before I made a mess.
Then we called the drain people. The pros that we need to call when we can't get to the clog. They have the big snakes. They knew how to handle this job, and they did.
Yes, sometimes working harder won't get you anywhere. I had a problem in my own life. I tried. I really did. I prayed. Then one night I decided to throw out everything I ever was told about how to handle my struggle. I wrote all about it recently in a post on my Substack called "I Invited God to Look at P*rn."
THAT... was different.
It also worked.
Thanks for writing this.